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Sunday, August 19, 2007

My letter to LIFE

Dear Life

It's been eight months....eight months of 2007 which just whooooooshed by. I thought it was just 2006 a blink of an eye ago. Your moments go by so fast that I don't realise the speed of things that go by. I thought you said you had 365 days, to a year?Or, 525,600 minutes, sang the troupe in RENT.

It doesn't feel that way, does it? It feels like everything is going so fast, so soon, so quickly - and I am 26! I miss my yesterdays with you. My yesterdays of - 12th floor girls only at Howitt Hall, my OCF Clayton days, my "I love economics" motivation drive, to trick my mind to believe that I really did love economics ( it worked...for 2 semesters, my mind kinda got the better of it the next semester!)

I misss....my school days, where I could walk in between the white washed pillars of MGS, smell the ancient, reeking toilets reigned and kept in tip top condition by my best friend (Jasmin), walk from the form 6 block to the Kemahiran Hidup block, and the canteen, wear the much envied prefects uniform, which I absolutely adored (at least from a young, fresh eyed 13 year old wanting to be like the older "che ches")..

Having said that..I also miss friends I made at Taylors...it was absolutely enjoyable..every single moment of AYA, and...SAM (hmmm...not entirely true, i kinda remember i did not sleep for 48 hours straight, and having cried in the 6.30 am Bangsar-Taylors bus, because of a very stressful IT project we had..I remember Poh Suan having submitted the project, her hair was super messy..the only time I saw her with uncombed (maybe) unwashed hair/face..etc

I also remember our IT teacher, Mr Chong - he said that I was doing really well in IT, but worried that i would not be able to focus with so many things to juggle - I was in the student council, involved in church, AYA, plus having to juggle SAM. OK..it was a struggle, I remember crying more than once during SAM, but it was well worth the effort and time..
I totally totally enjoyed myself! So, no regrets Mr Chong!


I misss tons of things..life..I miss my "dooona" bed, in Australia, I miss being greeted by clean, crsip air...and awakened by blue, blue skies and the sun, shining through my 12th floor window (which was the "tallest"building in Clayton) and I miss.....singing in the shower....I belted out song after song.....(great evangelical tool there!)

I miss life being lived..

Perhaps, I am missing even my moments now..where is my once GUNGHO ness, or my "JUST DO IT", "LETS DO IT", "I DON'T CARE, I WANT TO DO IT", NOW, kinda attitude...
I still have some in me, yes - i do..butI find myself playing middle fence more often now...must be the job influence =)

Life..we're in it together, 26 years old, 1/4 of 100 years old. I believe we have what we call - A quarter life crisis in our hands.. How shall we resolved the conflict? Refocus and realign our thoughts and strategy?

Life...telll me how we're in this forever? How is it all going to be like?
Too many questions at this juncture..and many recommendations..
But I need to be selective..
Pray, I make the right choices with God's guidance
Life, what say you - we just go chill now...

-jade-